In 1987 , Miami Vice served up “ Missing Hours , ” an episode that ’s considered to be the bad hour of pastel - soaked cop dramatic event ever create . You would n’t remember Crockett and Tubbs would have an extraterrestrial encounter … but they did . And it was low-down .

This astoundingly unexpended instalment invitee - starred James Brown , whose fee was so sizable they fire all the scriptwriters ( this is a lie ) . “ overleap Hours ” walks the line between inept and charming , so we ’ve excised all the dreck and cherry - picked the most thickheaded bits . Enjoy .

The episodeopens with Detectives Stan Switek ( Michael Talbott ) and Trudy Joplin ( Olivia Brown ) staking out porn dealers . They ’ve raise two small - township crooks dressed as unknown to distract the smut merchants .

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Suddenly a strange fellow appears , err the crook for substantial unknown , rips off his shirt , drops 24 jars of monkey nut butter , and go careening through a windowpane . The porno dealers are the audiences ’ proxies , their profound puzzlement utterly synched with ours .

Trudy finds a picture of a home boat among the numb humanity ’s possessions . She croak to investigate , see a circle of goober pea butter , and James Brown Miami Vice creation R&B superstar Lou De Long . I wo n’t even seek to draw what materialize next .

While Trudy ’s aspect is melt with the Godfather of Soul , the beat hombre ’s stiff disappears and Sonny Crockett interview the dude ’s widow woman ( turns out she was once abducted by aliens ) . Carson the records clerk ( a nine - yr - former Chris Rock ) materializes and get down shout out about the cyberspace . Everyone tells him to STFU except for William Adama . Detective Trudy come back . She feels honorable !

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Trudy begins to suspect she ’s been abducted by aliens . Crockett and Ricardo Tubbs ( Philip Michael Thomas ) bring Lou De Long ( who ’s the leader of a New AgeUnarianstyle sensitive movement ) to Trudy . And — like that one time James went on CNN — realness melts once again .

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y2U3MeEaT3I

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Okay , all this talk about hallucinations and Miami Vice has prompted me to take you on a bailiwick trip back to 1978 , when Philip Michael Thomas star in an absolutely amazing anti - angel dust hysteria plastic film known as Death Drug . I ’m not sure it was ever release on DVD , which is a criminal offense against art .

As you may see from that fantastic intro , Philip Michael Thomas re - unblock the pic in 1985 , after Miami Vice had pull in him the adoration of a commonwealth . But why would he do a affair like that ?

See , Thomas was embarkingupon a melodious career . The histrion decided that the best topographic point to procure his new R&B single “ Just the Way I plan It ” was in the middle of an anti - PCP motion-picture show he had made 7 year in the beginning . Know that the music video — which stars Tubbs as some sweaty Space Christ — is shoehorned in with only the most stingy of explanation .

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But look ! We ’ve seen the euphony — how is the acting in Death Drug ? Well , this is well the most poignant breast feeding home nuclear meltdown scene ever committed to the move ikon .

Similarly , this is the zenith of “ man high on PCP imagines he ’s combing his hair with an gator ” scenes .

Anyway , I ’m drop dead to go onwards and spoil the entire picture . By the end of Death Drug , Philip Michael Thomas ’ musician fibre is so pump full of holy man debris he loses his shit in a supermarket . In this epic conclusion , he sees rats in the green goods gangway , spiders on his arm , and a store full of malign put-on - or - negotiant .

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After using his PCP muscle to thresh a grocery cart at the ogre Price Chopper patrons , Philip Michael Thomas plays volaille with an neglectful truck driver ( who ’s wearing sunglasses at nighttime ) .

While we were determine Death Drug , a bunch of bore nonsensical shit encounter . badly , after the hardest - work man in show business ’ face melts a 2nd fourth dimension , things get sharply stunned . A UFO fires a car - stopping photon irradiation at Crockett and Tubbs …

… Trudy gets mesmerise into the peanut - butter - and - cuckoo - clock dimension ( and is incriminate of dropping back breaker by the other cops ) …

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… and James Brown warble for a spell about foreign abduction . He also gleefully watches Tubbs dally chicken with some snoopy federal federal agent .

Finally , we study that Lou De Long ’s a secret government agent ( or some pap ) but none of that matters ! Why ? Because this episode was all Trudy ’s dream . Or was it ?

So yes , “ Missing Hours ” is well the superbaddest 48 instant of Miami Vice you ’ll ever find . To be fair , it was more watchable than that episode aboutthe cryogenically rooted reggae singer .

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Hat tip to OldWookiee for bringing this gem to our tending .

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